Nachos are a health food. 5 am doesn't exist except for sleeping. I always have exactly what I need to complete a recipe. I never overcook the meal. Breakfast can be eaten at anytime of the day. Dishes clean themselves. Morning breath is always minty and fresh. Work does not start until at least 11 am. Even when I'm wrong, it sounds right. Cars emit bubbles that smell like flowers. Cats are always cuddly. Dog poo instantly transforms into dirt. The weather is never under 32 degrees. Each beach has fancy sea shells to collect. Sisters never fight. My imperfectly perfect man has already found and adores me. This man loves to do laundry. My hair looks perfect right out of the shower. Everyone knows I'm clever. Extra cheese is not asked, it's assumed.